My MIL tells a story about when Adam and I first started dating seriously; apparently they were having a heart to heart and she asked him if he really liked me, and he said, “Mom, I love the shit out of her.” Despite the recent problems, I love the shit out of that man.
Marriage is a slippery slope. There are certain things in a marriage that only the two involved will ever know about. Add kids to the mix and there’s a whole other complication. Adam and I have been through so much together; hell, we grew up together. When we moved in with each other, we were only 23 years old. We knew NOTHING about anything. We’ve seen each other through our worst times as well as the best. There are certain private things that we will never share with anyone else.
So when people in my life continue to tell me how horrible he is for me, or how he’s bringing me down, etc, etc, I have a hard time with that. I don’t take marriage vows lightly; perhaps that comes from being a product of divorce, but I feel that I stood up in that church in front of God and everybody and made a promise to stick this thing through, and stick to it I will. I know that there are ALWAYS certain situations that make it impossible to stay in a marriage, and that’s fine. My parents divorced because my dad was an alchoholic, and I completely understand that. But I’m NOT in an impossible situation; Adam does not abuse me, or any substances, he is loving and attentive and makes it a point to make me feel special.
We have been irresponsible together, and I know that most people on my end have a skewed view of things because they only get my side of the story. But like everything else in our relationship, we have created the problems together and will solve them together as well. I refuse to give up on my marriage, or the man that made me want to commit in the first place.
I love the shit out of him, after all.