An old therapist of mine used to ask me, “Do you really think that the universe cares that much about you?” This was in response to my frequent statements that I would “jinx” something by talking about it. And of course, my answer is yes, yes I do think that the universe cares that much about me, at least enough for something to be jinxed.
So it is with a deep breath and trepidation that I reveal this: my husband is a recovering addict. He’s been clean for about a year now, but I still am constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the cycle to start all over again. Hence my fear of “jinxing” life, because things are going so well right now.
However, it has been a long, hard road. We’ve gone though a lot. It’s more his story to tell then mine, but I can say that everything you hear about addicts and that you watch on “Intervention” probably happened to us. He would do anything, and I mean ANYTHING, to get drugs and to hide the fact that he was doing them. I left more than once but something (love?) made me give him one more chance. And then another. My family doesn’t agree with my decision to stay with him, and I can’t say I blame them. But as of today, he is sober and doing exactly what he needs to be doing for his family. I’m so proud of him, and I knew through everything this person was waiting inside him. I’m glad I stayed. Of course there are issues, there are always issues, we’re married. But all in all, I hope that I have made the right decision and that things will continue the way they’re going now.